Dealing with Old Memories

I was thrilled when I recently discovered that February 11th is the ‘ Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk’ Day, in recognition of the truth that everyone spills a little milk now and then. It’s a day to be optimistic, look on the bright side, find something good in everything that happens and get past it. For me, I would strive to have every single day as my ‘Don’t Cry Over Spilled Milk Day’. Won’t that be wonderful?

As the saying goes, “It’s no use crying over split milk.” It just doesn’t make sense dwelling on something that has already happened and cannot be changed, undone or rectified. Yet, we do that all the time. Dwelling on past disappointments and revisiting mistakes only prolongs suffering and hinders progress.

Many times we take a trip down memory lane in search of answers to what went wrong, what we could have done differently and so on. Sadly, we always return more confused, depressed and weighed down.

Everything about holding on to past mishaps is torturous. Letting go opens you up to new opportunities and less hurt, so put more effort into completely letting go. Disappointments are inevitable. Learn what you can from each experience, forgive others, forgive yourself, and move on. 

Don’t hold back and stay glued to the past, thus jeopardising the present and the future. Below are tips that could help:

• Take charge and watch out for possible flashback triggers. Identify what brings back painful and disruptive memories. Where were you? Who was around? What were you thinking about? How were you feeling? What were you watching or listening to?
• Avoid situations, activities, people and places that bring back negative memories until you are totally healed.
• Whenever you feel low, talk to a trusted friend and let out all your woes.
• Keep yourself occupied and productive.
• Indulge yourself once in a while by giving yourself a treat.
• Also try to relive happy memories that reconnect you with the feelings you had during the good old days and the early stages of your relationship when you were head over heels in love and your man could do no wrong. This certainly helps brighten things up.

Trust God to heal and set you free from limiting memories that keep you stuck in the past. But don’t forget, God expects you to play your part as stipulated in Isaiah 43:18-19; “Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.’

It’s time to move on and I hope you’ll make that choice!